Motherhood has been the greatest blessing and source of joy I could ever imagine. My children truly are my best friends. I cannot adequately convey the deepest feelings I feel about this sacred duty.
Some years ago, I wanted to somehow bring mothers together. So I began organizing a group for other mothers to learn from each other. It is through the website Power of Moms. (and it's linked on my homepage) In that group I have made many close friends and have loved learning from them.
With that I want to share just 3 principles that have reminded me how to always enjoy motherhood- the good and the harder times too.
Every moment that comes your way. The difficult ones -try to learn from them. The wonderful ones- relish them, and the sacred ones that come - hold on to them. For one day they will not be little anymore. They will grow, and they will grow too fast. You will miss the times you had with them, the little things they do and say- but the more you just pause and savor the moment the more gratitude you feel for your children and how you were blessed to be their mother. I've learned along the way that it takes work to be busy, to do all the chores required- the laundry, the shopping, bedtimes, nap times etc. , But it takes more work to slow down and enjoy those times. And while I am far from perfect at this, I do know the times I have slowed down, I have truly enjoyed the moment- whatever laundry piles may be looming or pile of dishes are in the sink.
On a date I took my 4-year-old on recently we talked about this again after he asked, "Mom, lets size hands". It's too special of a time for me to just put it all in this blog, but I know the principle of savoring each moment has blessed me to find even more moments, like that precious date with my baby, and him asking me again to "size hands" that wouldn't have come if I wouldn't have savored those times.
#2 Love really is spelled T-I-M-E:
Every child needs one thing. That thing is not more toys, a skinnier mother, the mom down the street you think is perfect...They need you. That's it. If you love reading to your children- read. If you love teaching your children- spend time with them learning and growing. Hike with them, bike with them... work with them...bake with them ...just be with them. And I promise you'll not only enjoy all moments -crazy ones too- you will naturally be the mom your children need.
I love playing with my children so I bought myself toys- yes, you read that right. I have my own dress-ups, cars (like Holly Shiftwell), and even my own light saber. And we play!! Whether it's basketball with my older boys, or cars with my younger ones we love to play together.
I also love to teach them and do crafts. I love putting together little lessons for them and get to home school and teach preschool to some of my boys. So lessons and crafts I get to do with them all the time. This has blessed me to spend greater time with them doing something I already love.
We love to bake (which is why I also have to love exercise🤣), and love being active together- hiking, biking, sports of all kinds- they even tried teaching me some parkour. (kinda failed at that one) But oh do we have fun!
Every moment spent reading together, singing to them, working with them, playing with them and learning with them is a joy. Failed parkour moves and all. And through it all I keep learning, they don't need me to be perfect (even in parkour), they just need me.
#3 Allow yourself room to grow. This has been harder for me to accept. I didn't feel like a put together queen of my castle sometimes. Because of my depression, I felt my children deserved a better mother. I didn't want them to have to see me have a hard day. I felt it was a day wasted of not being able to do things I usually would do and love. But now I understand more. They NEED to see me have hard times so they can see how I work through them. And now I view my depression as one of my greatest gifts to my children, because in that they can see Who I turn to for help- my Heavenly Father, they know some of how much I have grown and they know I will keep striving to be better.
So don't expect yourself to be perfect, instead expect yourself NOT to be. Your own trial or weakness may not be what mine is, but don't use it to feel bad about yourself- instead lift yourself to higher ground by turning to a Higher power. And in that, by loving where you are at now, you naturally allow yourself room to grow.